“Grow with me”…
Erik wanted to drill into my head hes been honest with me. There are times I have doubt for many many reasons. I can’t help but revert to back when I was a skeptic and a cynic. Back then someone like me would make me laugh. It’s funny how the tables turn. I was in denial of what was with me since 2009. I ignored my intuition, buried myself in work, barely used my cards or cared about anything spiritual.
He said it was good that no matter what my situation is; I love him and nothing would change that. We spent lifetimes listening to what other people told us and we suffered for it. As Augusta, it was worse. I was left alone with two of our children given only a pension all because he was royal and I was his “illegitimate” wife. Seeing it all confirmed in print tripped me up. It took me a year after learning about that past life to see for myself.
Now he’s dead…But he came back.
I probably written about this twice, a psychic said that my brother would return. It made no sense to me. Then to learn in a past life he was my brother. I guess it makes sense. To a degree. But I’ve loved so many men. I can’t even count. They all but one (my first bf) disappointed me, let me down, used me or misled me. They really hurt but Erik came back to make things right.
In 2017 Erik came to me in a dream. We were face to face when he begged me to forgive him. I didn’t know who he was and I was confused. But when I realized it was Erik I needed to find out what he was so sorry for…I have forgiven him so that’s when he said that I should continue to grow with him.
It kills me that I still have a long life to live.
But I want to live it so much even though some days are harder than others. At least I can say that my love is unconditional and it’s given back to me tenfold. Our little chat had me chocked up a bit. It felt good to feel like I’ve really forgiven him. Without forgiveness we can’t move forward. Forgiveness doesn’t mean the pain is gone. The pain of his “absence” can be felt beyond this lifetime and it will never go away. But what I’m learning is to believe we are still together even though he’s not in this world.