Outlander

It’s a small observation…I can relate to Clair in some ways; in one of our past lives I was a little like her. It took me a while to research into that particular life because it was kind of creepy (?) Erik told me I could look her up so a year later I got the nerve to see for myself. I was heavily into natural medicine and so very in love with Erik (Augustus). It was evident in the journals she wrote which coincidentally was similar to how I still write in my books. Especially when I was younger I also quoted lyrics and allowed my friends to write too. It shook me to see everything in writing right there! I don’t talk about it much because there’s not really a point to it.

I feel sort of stuck between two worlds. This one and the one I go to in my trance-statr to safely talk to Erik. This is so I’m protected from demons and celestial baddies. We are free to do whatever in our astral home and basically nowhere else. I used to visit The Realms but doing so now just makes me miss home more so I rather our friends visit us in our home. I know how this sounds but I’ve not been able to do any of this until this journey started with my pendulum and even then I never thought any of this was possible!

The kind of relationship we have is similar.

I don’t like to talk much about my feelings. I’m a person of a few words. Writing is better but it’s still something I’m not too comfortable with. For the sake of this blog, I’ll say that what we have is similar. I’ve never loved anyone this much before and I don’t think I will in this life. I know from reading about that past life, I didn’t either. I died alone and he didn’t marry untill my passing. I can think of a reason why.

So sometimes I get a little emotional and homesick when I watch this show. I also feel very idk…it’s hard to put in words. Before you judge me (if you are miserable with your own life and want to take it out on me)…Don’t worry, Rick knows about this but I still feel so screwed. The heaviness and frustration of everything about this journey is what makes me cry myself to sleep at night. Sometimes I feel like I just can’t take it anymore. It’s a burden I don’t wish on anyone and I wish that I could go back and never have started this years ago.

😘💕 Good night.

This entry was posted in tumblr blog and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.