i think a lot about this message i got once… it was sent to me after i had made a post on the topic of my drug addiction and recovery:

“how did someone like you end up on heroin?”

and I think that question is truly the heart of why i choose to talk openly about my experiences with drug addiction on social media. i think that’s what it’s all about for me

because people need to know that anyone can be an addict.

and yes, that includes being addicted to Scary drugs like heroin and meth.

im not special. NOBODY is special when it comes to addiction. addiction doesn’t care about who you are or where you’ve come from. it doesn’t care about your morals. it doesn’t care how smart you are, or how good or bad of a person you’ve been.

addiction is a disease, and it’s a disease that will kill you if it goes untreated.

so many people refuse to get help out of guilt and fear and shame……drug use and drug addiction are so stigmatized and it is literally killing people.

so I say, if my talking about these things helps even one person understand addiction better, if it does even the slightest bit to help influence positive and helpful discussion ….. then it’s all worth it

As much as I hate to admit it, I had a short issue with spice for two years. It was shortly after Erik died. All I cared about was escaping the grief I didn’t understand because what the psychic said about Erik’s impending death was pushed out of my mind. I didn’t want to believe he could be right. My intuition knew it was true because of his presence in my dreams, so to avoid confrontation I got high. It was better than being sober and completely miserable not knowing why. How do you talk about grieving a death of someone you don’t know?

You can’t and you don’t. The best way I could cope was by partying, drinking and mostly smoke some fake weed. I was an intuitive in denial. All the feelings I had battled with my sense of logic and reasoning. I felt I was spiralling. Imagine being an otherwise rational and logical person and constantly having to deal with premonitions and supernatural forces around you. It’s been like 12 or 13 years and I still have that issue. It’s not as bad but I’ve learned to deal with my spiritual journey so much better.

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