Erik changed to this song. It had been a while since he messed with my music. He had done it on all my phones so good luck trying to tell me it’s coincidence, behotch! 🤣😂🤣👌

I think he changed it because of how its like saying how I don’t think he hurts like I do. I try to ignore him when I feel I’ve had enough. Only because of the fact he’s dead and I’m lonely, I find it hard to believe him when he says he’s sorry for leaving me in every life time.

As much as I would like to live a normal life without my intuitivness. I try to think he’d be okay if I walk away or tell him off for “bothering” me when all he tries to do is help me. I can’t just drop everything because there’s no going back.

I don’t like to dream anymore in the case he’s there. Even meditating is hard sometimes because it freaks me out that he’s dead. Hense the heavy sleep medications.

Basically during times that are fucked up, I think I’m better off without him. But it’s when times are fucked up I need him the most. It’s not like I have anyone around I can reallt trust. At least until then I have to accept the help he’s trying to give me.

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