Confidence in my journey: Why I don’t care if Erik’s my TF (or not).
We’ve been at this for 5 years. It included changing my skeptical and cynical attitudes about love and spirituality. I used to be an atheist borderline agnostic depending on my mood lmao. So I’ve had to start my journey fresh. A clean slate!
It’s going to be 6 years on this journey in about 5 months. In just the past 2 months mourning the loss of a very dear friend of mine, Matt who I spent so much of my time with while we were homeless. Then my TFs bday came around and then his death anniversary. I was angry, grieving, depressed. Matt was so important to me it felt like I lost Erik again.
I’m not going to tell you our story, Erik and I.
You can find it in the table of contents pinned on my blog. Over the course of 2 months, I began to realize that the TF community is full of conditional love. All the signs and shit people talk about are just a list of condition someone has to meet to be considered their TF. That’s not unconditional love.
Yes we meet some of the so-called “criteria” but that’s not important. People place these criteria as some kind of important bible when there’s no scientific evidence of twin flames. It’s just a social-spiritual construct. Something we made up to explain some magical relationship with someone when a lot of times there’s no magic between TF at all. It doesn’t need to be romantic, they don’t have to meet those conditions.
So I really thought about this:
I don’t need validation and I’m perfectly happy if I’m wrong about Erik being my TF. I still have all of those dreams and experiences that total up these past 5 years. The TF title doesn’t mean anything to me because I love him regardless of those things. There is so much ignorance surrounding the whole concept. He’s still my TF, I just don’t need some community filled with false sense of what love is.
Erik is my spiritual partner first and my TF second. I like to call us Twin Souls now anyway because that term doesn’t have as much negativity around it. I love Erik unconditionally. I don’t care what people say or think. Our past lives were riddled with ridicule over our relationship.
In all our past lives our relationship wasn’t allowed.
So in this life I’m embracing it. All of it because we couldn’t in the past. The pattern will end with me and I’m not afraid this time. I just don’t give a fuck about how people feel. It’s not my problem. IT WILL NEVER BE MY PROBLEM! They will get over it.
People who have a problem truly don’t know what unconditional love is. If they did, they wouldn’t have a stick up their ass about what I do on my spiritual journey. They would accept it and move on or support. Whatever it is, I don’t fucking care.
Because I don’t care, it’s a weight off my shoulders.
Over the past 2 months reflecting on above, I feel so much lighter, free-er, so much more love in my heart. I can smile at the thought I “could be wrong about all this”. Deep down I know I’m not wrong, but I feel comfortable either way because again, first and foremost, he’s my spiritual partner. There’s so much I’ve experienced it would be completely irresponsible of me to ignore at this point. So yeah. Be jealous. Be mad. Be whatever you think you need to be.
😘💕 Just know that real unconditional love conquers ALL!
…Even petty backwards bullshit like the TF community or ignorant gaslighting “spiritualists”.