I’m getting desperate
Desperate for a revolution
Some kind of spark
Some kind of connection
In these dangerous days
Come a little bit closer
I need to understand
Reminds of the beginning. Before I met Erik and the dreams became more frequent. I heard this song before back in 2016 and didn’t care for this song. But it began to make sense a year later. This reminds me of our lifetimes. I fought but he didn’t in any of them. It makes me kind if angry thinking about it.
Why we kill the things we love the most
Kill the things we love
Kill the things we love the most
Why we kill the things we love the most
Kill the things we love
Kill the things we love the most
But they don’t burn like we do
They don’t burn like we do
And even though our love is doomed
And even though we’re all messed up
We’re still waiting for tomorrow
We’re still aching for tomorrow
And even though our love is cruel
And even though our stars are crossed
You’re the only thing worth fighting for
You’re the only thing worth dying for
While things seem to be messed up in this life, it isn’t what it seems because we never were apart. He’s the reason I’m still alive. I lived because I wanted to find him and I live because I have found him. In my death, he’ll be there.
Don’t wanna be dead to life
Don’t wanna be dulled to extinction
Don’t wanna be lost in dreams
Don’t wanna be caught sleepwalking
Maybe I should break the chain
Maybe I should break the connection
Such strange little birds
Devoured by our obsessions
The times I felt this journey was a joke. My logical side wants to fight with my heart. I don’t want to fall into craziness and I don’t want to be thought of as a crazy person. Several times I’ve thought of giving all of this up because I feel unqualified to handle this. Breaking the chain means breaking all of my pendulums I use to communicate with him but I don’t need them anymore anyway. It wouldn’t work.
Can you love me for what I’ve become
Love me for what I
Said that I would not become
Can you love me for what I’ve become
Love me for what I
Said that I would not become
Cause they don’t burn like I do
They don’t burn like I do
Sometimes I get so angry about being on this path. Frustrated with everything. After I promise to not give up, I frequently go back to wanting to give up. It seems easier to drop this and forget about it but I’ve come so far or have gone so far down.
And even though your love is cruel
And even though our stars are crossed
We’re still waiting for tomorrow
We’re still aching for tomorrow
And even though our love is doomed
And even though we’re all messed up
You’re the only thing worth fighting for
You’re the only thing worth dying for
