Saw some of my cousins for the first time in at least 10 years. Some are married with kids and another on the way. What I saw was, life, death, and my late relatives all around my great aunts casket. I couldn’t help but think about my grandpa. He’s getting older and his 81st bday is on the 19th.

My granny is dead and I have long talks with her. I know she’s waiting for my grandpa too. Probably in my selfishness I want my grandfather to stick around to see his great grandchildren. I want him to be proud of me. Couldn’t help but realize I can’t take life for granted. I have to call him up and tell him I love him and since he’s moved to GA, I miss the shit out of him and our long geeky talks. I miss watching biographies and science documentaries and debating about theories. We both love to argue. 😂👌

So I’m in the car jonesing for a drink.

What I really want to do is visit granny’s grave in Connecticut like she wants me to… And drink Gin over it. 😂👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼Oh and pour a bit on top of. Me and granny both appreciate a good drink. I know if she were alive we would both be drinking and act goofy. I miss the shit out of her. We are so much alike and family always say I look just like her. 🤣 Lmao!

I know what Erik wants me to do. The biggest issue is fear. When the time comes I have to remember that Erik and granny are always in my heart. I have to think about them and my grandpa before his time is up. I need to have what I can’t with Erik.

😘💕❤️ I love all of you!

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(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧Don’t forget to take a look at Erik’s blog ran by his amazing mom Dr Elisa Medhus. Lots of stuff about his afterlife and 💩 at

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