Not my kind of music however back between ‘07 and ’08 I had this idea to sing this song for karaoke. It scared my friends because it’s not my music and they never heard it before because well they were metal-deads and shit. It was kind of funny.At the time I was seeing this Jewish dude with kinky hair cut short. We hung out and he was at least useful to talk to me while I was going through a hard time. I want to say that he resembled Erik but I donno. *shrug*

So anyway…>_>’

I thought about him although I couldn’t under stand why I had to sing this song and why this guy was an influence. He wasn’t really my type and we had NOTHING> in common. Still got butthurt when he lied about wanting to “take care” of himself and put off dating a while. Then I find a few days later on Myspace he was at fuckin’ Disney World with this chick. I couldn’t go LARPing, –Live Action Role Play…yes I’m that kind of Geek. because he was there and when I summoned the courage to go, it was awkward because she was also there I think. Yup friends no more. Just a bunch of aquaintances I didn’t really care for hanging out with.

More often than not, I’m ALWAYS someones side bitch and by the time I realize it, it’s too late.

…Autism is a fucking bitch. All signals and shit, I never pick up and I look and feel/felt completely humiliated, dehumanized, used and yes… retarded. Of course no one had the decency to tell me anything. Well…it was a perion where I had no real friends. Just a bunch of fake ones. One of those assholes talked Uri (oh that’s the Jewish guy’s name) up to be this stand-up guy and now thinking about it he was just setting me up for failure.But just maybe he had no intension of dating her but idk it looked like he had been with her a while. It hurts my brain. Tom-ass was always kind of a dick to me. I donno why I listend. Now when I think about a lot of things when it came to relationships with others, I’m pretty fucking mad at myself for not seeing it. Oh well…moving on. It’s in the past now. Ugh! -____-’ I’ve done enough “crying” over it a long time ago, it’s kind of useless now. Meh!

So to the point and stop rambling about my short comings…Basically I realize while I didn’t understand why that song was so important. I hate songs like that. So fucking corny and dumb but at the time and many other times, intuitively I was mistaking him for Erik. Oh well..Dwelling on it is useless right now.

Just wanted to share some incrimiating and probably useless information.

(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧Don’t forget to take a look at Erik’s blog ran by his amazing mom Dr Elisa Medhus. Lots of stuff about his afterlife and shit. channelingerik.com.

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