I was always targeted for things I can’t really control like being “slow”, socially inept, “crazy” and…. Ugly. Also didn’t get enough if at all love and attention by my mother so I became an asshole too. Like being scrutinized or bullied to fuck is perfectly fine but if I break a rule or do something stupid, I’m grounded for weeks. My younger brother commits the same “crime”, he’s sentenced to half. I guess because I have to set example or whatever idk.
I take klonopin for generalized Anxiety stemming from the bullshit I’ve dealt with. Even still bullied in the workplace. But then I have at least 5 different guys who confess their still feelings for me and sometimes a random guy I meet just blows up my phone. The thought now of being alone with a guy other than Vince is terrifying. I let my asshole show when I see something someone is doing. Like a pet peeve (lol pun) is when people bring thier NON-SERVICE dog in to a store. A grocery store. It’s just wrong and I’m sure illegal. So I make fun of them because they think it’s cute to pretend to be disabled just so they can look cute with thier pansy dogs.
Tell me that isn’t weird AF…
What’s more irritating is there was this geeky girl who was in IT department fixing computers. One of the managers said she was weird after she left and I stood up for her. Then months later find she was talking shit about me. It hurt and I wasn’t surprised.
I have like no idea what I do to people that make me a target. Socially ineptness is likely but it’s not something I can help. I can’t help it if a group of randome people talk about something I know a lot about… I have to jump in and correct them. That’s happened several times and I have way too much information. Idk…
Just never really felt like anyone stuck up for me.
Even my own family criticized, excluded and belittled me for being different. My close cousin actually defended me. That’s all I remember.
😘 💞 💕 ❤️ Love you guys, GN!
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